You can get lost in a pigs belly of bad bar-b-q here in the south so it pays to do your research. Before we left for Hot Springs last week we consulted our road food experts of Here Comes Trouble fame, and also the website Roadfood. Both connoisseur resources insisted that we stop at Craigs BBQ in De Valls Bluff, a quaint little town near the White River in Arkansas.

Roadfood said the rib plate was the real hit, but they don’t live in Memphis so we went with the other advice to get the cheeseburger. Yes, The cheeseburger. We were not disappointed.

Slaw-on-burger. Just order it the way it comes.

The service was great and the clientele was nothing but camo and Carharts. Not too many people dined inside but we did because we had to stay put – our desert was waiting across the street.

We were told that we had to get pies from The Pie Lady, a kind older woman who runs a pie shop out of her house, after we ate at Craigs. As you can see, the home is clearly labeled.

Inside was a trove of magical light and buttery crusts.

We ordered two apricot fried pies and ate them on the road. They tasted like homemade jam and dirty fruit. That is kind of what I call the decor of the place as well: Homemade Jam and Dirty Fruit – it is a distinct southern style. I’d go back for sure. Whole Pie style.

The latest Vista Video taken inside the historic Fordyce Bath House in Hot Springs, AR shows the gym equipment of yesteryear:

The great American South! My AAA "Going Places" Magazine includes everything from Kentucky to Florida as southern information. They aren't wrong over there at going places, but for the purposes of discussion and creative travel analysis, lets define the differing parts of the south. After all, I guarantee you could tell someone from Kentucky and Louisiana apart upon a short introduction. Let's not lump everyone together.

I pulled these graphics from the ol' Wikipedia under a search for "The American South"

So you can see some of the overlap (check my "midwest zones" entry as well) and changes to what we consider the contemporary south:

So that is what we do with Oklahoma! I'll have to correct it in my zones.

Here is The Biggest Butte Southern Zone Interpretive Map:

If you want to go on a road trip with me there are only a couple requirements:

1. You must be able to accommodate your dietary needs at places like Circle K, McDonalds, and Flying J Truck Stops without commentary about things being bad or good or gluten this or that.
2. You must be able to “get ready” within five minutes.
3. You must refrain from saying, “Oh this is so great, I need to come back here.” Because that is annoying since you are already there, in an awesome place.

That being said – you know where I really want to revisit? Cairo, IL.

I thought about going back there the whole time I was there.

I took the five mile detour after being on the road for nine hours so I was a little too bugged out to do any serious exploring. The tired mind comes up with the kind of young-gal-in –abandoned-building murder scenarios that would make Rob Zombie barf.

So I want to go back. Maybe with Rob Zombie. Maybe with you, should you fulfill the above set of requirements. You should also know that there is a second set of requirements that go further into musical taste, conversational aptitude, and apocalyptic survival skills, but let’s just see if you can concoct a peanut-allergy, vegan friendly meal out of the cold case at 7-11 first.